New 'Dragon Tattoo' Fashion Line Will Guarantee That Nothing Gets Between You and Your Lisbeth

Photo courtesy of H&M
Photo courtesy of H&M

You know how every time Tom Cruise is cast in something, the Internet lets out a collective groan of dismay? Well, it's not like he can't hear you. In a recent interview, Cruise acknowledged the flap over his being cast in the adaptation of Lee Child's One Shot (on paper, the character is a six-and-a-half-foot-tall killing machine). The author claims that they merely cast the actor with "the most talent." I guess that works if you consider that Tom Cruise's talent is more densely packed into fewer square inches than, say, Ron Perlman's.

Last year, a trade paperback of The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo was the ultimate accessory. Thanks to H&M, this winter you'll be able to round out the whole outfit. That's right, a clothing line inspired by Lisbeth Salander. Do you think next they'll start selling the comically oversize boxer shorts that Johnny Depp wears in the "Rum Diary" poster?

While we're on the subject of his notable garments, do you recall angora-sweatered Johnny as the schlock film director Ed Wood? It turns out Wood had a second career as an author -- of sleazy pulp paperbacks, which a gallery in NYC will have on exhibition in November (images are tame by "Jersey Shore" standards, but view at your own discretion). Wood wrote under many pseudonyms, and the books are now considered incredibly rare. If Depp revisited the role of Hunter S. Thompson, maybe he can be convinced to give Wood another shot. Someone alert H&M.

Speaking of breathing new life into old characters, it looks like Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels will be revisiting their "Dumb and Dumber" roles after seventeen years of relative peace and quiet. No word yet on whether Carrey will have the cap on his front tooth removed yet again in order to provide his character with that crucial touch of realistic idiocy. I say ditch the whole tooth -- a sequel's always got to raise the stakes.